Submitted by mmcdubose on Sat, 10/11/2008 - 00:08
I was thrilled to find this website after doing a google search for "abusive adoptive parents." I had done this many times before only to get very few hits that never really led to anything.
I have cut all contact with my adoptive family. It took me several years to do this because I never gave up trying to have a good relationship with them until 2006. It was foolish, but since they had mellowed a bit with age, I thought I could put the past behind me. It wasn't to be that way because, although the physical abuse had ended, the verbal abuse had not. And they were very mean to my children behind my back, threatening them not to tell me what went on during their visits to "Granny's house." When I finally knew there was a problem, it took my children months before they felt safe enough to tell me how she had treated them.
I'll have to gather my thoughts to be able to tell my story. And I'll have to abandon any plans to do anything for the rest of the day since talking about my life with those people either gives me a panic attack or puts me into a withdrawn and nihilistic mood for quite some time after.
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Leaving the Adoptive family behind
I am a foster child. Although I am 35 and fierce, I am really at the day's end a foster child. I left the sick, twisted abusive adoptive family when I was 17. It has been a lonely road, but free from abuse. This has been the first website that I found relevant...to my secret shame -being a foster child. Thank you for your honest email.
So have I
I too have tried for YEARS to win my adoptive parents love and affection. An apology from them would have even sufficed for the way they treated me and my sister......but I still am terrified of them and when I do visit for the purpose of gathering info to help me with my search for my birth family, I can only bear a couple of days. If I stay any longer I too get panic attacks that they will kill me in my sleep or something. They have made themselves very clear that I am not wanted and accepted by them for who I am. Once I get the information I need from them, I do not plan on resuming contact. They are sick, twisted people. I to this day have no idea why they hit us...nearly every single day! And I would not be suprised if adoptive dad hit me again, now at the mature age of 36, if he wanted to. He is so full of himself and very compettive as my partner put it.